A Non-fiction Elegy

 "Baba, wake up. How many more times do I have to wake you up after switching off your snooze?" I woke up hearing Amma's voice. Rubbing my eyes, I sat up on the bed, yawning. 

"I'm up Ma," I called after her. 

"I told you I had a feeling yesterday na?" Amma asked. I frowned and swung my legs to the floor.

Walking out the bedroom, "About what Ma?" I asked her. 

"The Metropolitan (the highest authority of the Mar Thoma Church)." She said.  

My eyes widened. "No." 

"Yes. Early morning today." She shook her head. I looked over at Appa typing furiously into his phone. 

"Good morning Pa," I said. He looked up. 

"Not such a good morning," he said. I smiled wanly. Ma was serving the customary morning tea before prayer. 

"I'll just come," I told her, grabbing my toothbrush and smearing it with Colgate. 

 The cool water on my face pulled me out of my morning blues. I stared at myself in the mirror. I was still processing the news I just received and strangely enough, I was numb. That inability to feel must have made me rough with my brushing, I realized as I scraped my gums. I wasn't close to the former Leader of our Church and except for my parents doting reminders of my early childhood interactions with him and a couple of formal, heavily crowded meetings, I'd never even met the man - or the Legend, as some would say. He was known for his spearheaded, no-nonsense attitude, especially when it came to the Church, its people and its traditions. Unfortunately, I'd never had the privilege of getting to know him, perhaps that's why I wasn't feeling anything. Of late, his reactions to otherwise disturbing news had made me question my allegiance to him on more than one occasion, but I would be lying if I said I'd wanted him gone. In my eyes, yet another leader had fallen short of his true purpose, yet another argute mind failed to recognize the untapped potential of today's generation called 'youth' and yet another visionary has been removed from the face of the Earth, with only memories left behind. 

 I sighed as I sat down on the reclining chair in our living room. My parents had just broken the news to my brother and I could tell that even he wasn't taken aback by it. I beckoned to Appa to pass me the paper, expecting the front page to blow up more news of the fallen soul in my face. 

"It isn't in the paper!" Amma was talking into her tea cup, "happened too late." 

"Oh no," I said, "to think that most papers would've wanted to report this."  

"That place is going to be crowded for the next two days na?!" My brother exclaimed suddenly. I looked at him quizzically. "The SC Church (a church in Kerala); Pa said his mortal remains were being brought there for public viewing from 8am," he explained. 

"Hope they follow the guidelines!" I sighed again. "If only we knew more about him to feel something." My family looked at me. I shrugged, "I mean there are people at a loss for words around us and all I can manage is 'I wish I knew him better!' If you think about it, it is sad, that not many people have actually seen his 'good' side." Hearing sighs in affirmation, I prayed that His Grace's family finds their much needed peace.